When I first learned that I needed to have more surgery I was hopeful of being able to bear weight a lot sooner this go around knowing what this procedure involved compared to the one 6 months earlier. So I was far from prepared when my doctor told me sternly and definitively, “Three months of absolutely no weight bearing” (last time was two). My heart sank as I had already felt like my life had been put on hold this entire year due to the pain and inability leading up to the first surgery in March and then all the healing and complications that followed it.
Yet, here I am in the middle of those three months content as can be! Can you say, “GRACE”? Would I chose different circumstances? Absolutely! But for His reasons, God has me here in a wheelchair, fully dependent on my mom and unable to be out living life as ‘normal’. Yet, through the years I have learned the value of growing right where I’ve been planted. When I’m not fighting my circumstances, I am at peace and available for God to use.
It’s so easy to wiggle and squirm when we’d rather be ‘over there’. Perhaps for you over there is a different job/role, a different relationship or any number of different circumstances than what you are in now. We can easily overlook our value and purpose when we feel like we are in situations that tie our hands from being able to live life fully. But here’s the thing — our worth and purpose shouldn’t depend on our circumstances. Our purpose should be ongoing regardless and therefore adapt to our surroundings. It is no longer, “If I can just get out of where I am now, THEN ________.”
I mentioned earlier how in many ways I have felt like my life has been on hold this year, but I am making an effort to change that perspective this go around. Several weeks ago, I purposed in my heart to go through this season of ‘stillness’ conscious and intentional, not wanting to waste this time by complaining or wishing it away. I want God to use me and this time. Seven months ago, I never would have imagined I’d still be in this place of healing, but I have been so content just learning to be who God has called me to be in THIS season.
Contentment is a choice…and an empowering one at that. As the saying goes, sometimes we just have to grow our own sunshine. When we create an atmosphere of life, hope and grace out of our disparaging situations, we create new opportunities to shine.
If you find yourself fighting with God and where He has you, please be careful not to overlook your value where you are TODAY. God has given each of us a sphere of influence right where we are and equipped us to be used “for such a time as this”.
“…I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.” Philippians 4:11b-13